I’ve gotten very behind on blogging! I’ll do my best to nutshell this (but we all know how “well” I do at being concise).
Friday a friend texted me to tell me she’d be in my town Saturday. We made plans to lunch at my restaurant followed by hiking. I had my yoga lesson at 7am. I grabbed a very naughty breakfast after (french toast made from apple fritters), and then on my way home, I had the idea I wanted to make balls out of my doughnut dough, stuff them with raspberry filling, and cover them in chocolate. I was home by 9:30am and figured I’d finish before noon. I could take them with me to the restaurant when I went to meet her.
It did not quite work out that way. My dough balls worked out fine. (I later found out what I really made is called zeppole.) While the dough proofed, I worked on the raspberry filling. I used organic raspberries and sugar and tried cooking it down, but I eventually thickened it with flour. The chocolate I made for the outside was a glaze/ganache hybrid. The problem I faced was I didn’t know how to get the berries into the doughnuts.
I could not find my food syringe and ended up having to use a much smaller one. This was problematic, because the raspberry seeds kept clogging it. I was being stubborn, though, so I kept at it. My friend ended up having to meet me at home, because I was not finished at noon. I taught her how to ganache the balls as I continued to struggle with the filling. Finally, at about 1:30, all 68 zeppole were ready to go. They ended up being a huge hit! (It wasn’t until much later someone pointed out I could have used my pastry bag and filling tip to do the job much faster. This is something my brain should have been able to figure out before going to all that work!)
We ate lunch at my restaurant and then went hiking. There is a reservoir on my street just 2-3 minutes from my house. There are 10 miles of hiking trails around this reservoir. I had never been there, so we chose this spot to go. It was gorgeous!! We had a lot of fun. I drove her a little crazy with my off-trail water chasing, and she said a few times she was having to be the Monica to my Phoebe, but we had fun. After that, we went to my smoothie bar for smoothies and called it a day. (There is more reading to do below the following media)
I don’t rmember all of Saturday’s symptoms. Impulse-control was definitely an issue, as was not being able to troubleshoot the filling. Depression continues to be a problem.
Sunday was doughnut day. I decided after doughnuts I would take a lunch out to the reservoir and picnic then hike. I made myself a lunch while at the restaurant selling doughnuts. Once the last customer left, I drove out to the reservoir. I found a quiet spot to eat and look at the water. When I finished, I was in no hurry to hike. I sat there for a very long time and eventually took a nap. After my nap, I finally hiked for about 2.5 hours. I went home after my fourth hour since arriving. I didn’t want to ever come home, but my hip was hurting.
I forgot to bring water with me. I grabbed a coconut water from the restaurant, but that was not good enough. I am surprised I forgot water. That’s usually high on my priority list. (There is more reading to do below the following media)
I don’t remember much else of Sunday. There are many unaccounted for hours. I know I did a workout that evening, but that’s all I can remember. The depression is getting too big to chase away with all this activity. It’s trying to kill me.
Yesterday (Monday) was my birthday. My first class sang to me. Two of my alumni who are off in college doing their own thing sent me happy birthday text messages! It was encouraging to know students who are off embarking on their college adventures still have my phone number and care enough to wish me a happy birthday. That makes me think I am doing something right.
When I got ready for work yesterday, I packed a bag to go running at the reservoir. I noticed on Sunday the trail around just the reservoir (not all the crazy hiking trails) seemed perfect for running. I used a map app to measure a trip around, and it was 2/3 of a mile. This means I need only run it six times to get my four miles (three clockwise and three counterclockwise, to prevent boredom and to help with runner’s knee and shin splints). After work, I changed, made sure to remember to bring water, and drove out to the reservoir.
I got winded much faster running outside than I do on the treadmill, but other than that, it was amazing! This was my first run outside in over twelve years! Who knew that all the work I’ve been putting in since December would end up being a birthday gift to myself when I got to run outside on my birthday? And I found this beautiful place to do it just in time!
Around 9pm last night, my husband finally remembered it was my birthday. He rushed out and bought flowers and a balloon to celebrate my 50th then argued with me that I didn’t make sense when I said 1969+50=2019 not 2018 and that it was my 49th birthday.
Symptoms were going crazy yesterday. I was saying wrong words. Unable to find words. Speaking slowly. I was mentally fatigued much earlier in the day. The depression continued to try to rule everything.